I know I know, you read a title like that and you automatically think this is going to be another blog about sex magic or sacred masturbation, “gettin’ off for the Gods”! But you’d be wrong, yah big pervs! Not that that isn’t a topic worth exploring, mind you, but there are plenty of other blogs available for that, just ask the mighty Googler!
What I’m actually talking about could, perhaps, be more appropriately categorized as self respect rather than self love but the two do tend to go hand in hand. If you don’t love yourself you tend to not show yourself the self love/care you deserve. That’s when the fuckers start to take advantage but perhaps I get ahead of myself.
Ideas like self esteem, self love, body positivity, et all are hot button topics these days, and rightfully so, but I’m not talking about loving yourself just for the sake of loving yourself. You totally should, of course, but as pagans/witches/whatever I feel there is another element to the concept of self love/respect.
If you are a pagan/witch that does not work with the Divine, that identifies as agnostic or atheist (they exist, y’all) than this topic isn’t really for you. But many of us, myself included, have made devotion to a specific deity or set of deities a focus of our practice. It is an integral part of our lives, not just our practices, and many of us feel as if we were chosen by our deities. That we are Their emissaries in a way and we embody Them.
You can’t really stop people from running their mouths or being disrespectful assholes in public. You can argue, sure, but it’s their right to be a douche bag (within the law of course). But would you let someone to enter your sacred space, the place where you honor and commune with your deities, and allow them to start talking shit about your tradition and your Gods? I would bloody well hope not! That’s a good way to get smacked ‘round these here parts. You can have whatever opinion you want but you’ll keep a civil tongue in your head when you are in my space.
Furthermore, would you accept another practitioner saying that they venerate the same Gods, practice the same tradition, yet sit on their ass and give your gods only passing attention or, even worse, full blown neglect? While you can’t control what another does you can control whether or not you allow that kind of behavior in your life and personal practices.
So why should it be any different when it comes to those we interact with on a personal level? If we are the physical manifestation of the divine, if we are Their Chosen, why do we allow others to treat us with disrespect? If we truly are Their Chosen than disrespect shown to us is disrespect shown to Them.
It doesn’t have to be abusive behavior, either. It goes beyond physical, mental, or emotional abuse into areas that might not be as obviously disrespectful to some. Things like only calling when you need something, using someone as a distraction when you feel like it but forgetting about them when you return to your regular life, a life they do not make you a part of. Being treated as if you are the backup plan in the event nothing better comes along...or an afterthought.
This is something I stress with my heathens (those members of my group) or those who seek witchy learnin’ from me. If you choose to work with the Gods you can not simply invoke Them when you need something. It is all well and good to invoke Luna when you need help with your spell or your divination but it is NOT all well and good to forget about Her as soon as you have what you need. It’s disrespectful and just downright bad manners! If you are going to work with the Gods, seek Their wisdom and aide, then you had damn well better be prepared to show Them the proper respect. That means acknowledging Them all the time, not just when you need something from them.
It should be no different in how we allow others to interact with or treat us. I was chosen by my Goddess to establish the Path of the Starspun Grove, I am Her Chosen in that regard and as such I am an extension of Her. To disrespect me is to disrespect Her and that I simply can not allow. And if you think the Gods do not notice when you give your power away and allow people to start taking advantage of you or treating you as if you are unimportant (which is what all this behavior boils down to really) think again. They notice, they’re Gods for fucks’ sake, they “see all”. Not only do they notice but, depending on the deity you work with, there is a very good chance it’s gonna piss Them off.
I’m not saying you should start walking around like an arrogant dick proclaiming yourself a God and demanding everyone bow down to you, that’s a one way ticket to a good old fashioned ass whoopin’.
What I am saying is...remember who you are. Remember Who you belong to. Remember that you walk with the mantle of the divine about your shoulders and never let someone treat you as if you are less than they, as if you are unimportant. You are not their back up bitch. You are not an afterthought. You are deserving of, and should be demanding, respect.
Try and remember that...because if you don’t the cosmic bitch slap intended to wake you up is gonna hurt, I guarantee it.
*Originally published December 28th, 2017 on my now defunct Wordpress site.
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